J.W. Ocker: Ghosts of Christmas Treats Past

The Burl Ives snowman is a lot of what's right in the world.

November 27, 2010 – Last year, I got a little carried away with my Christmas candy. First off, I’m a big proponent of vice as tradition, so, per that idea, I traditionally over-over-over-indulged in a sleighful of cloying, mass-produced, brand-named, red, white, and green confections. In addition, to further compound my lack of self-control (or, as is more accurate, my myth of self-control), I took pictures of some of the cooler stuff before I ate it. I guess I was trying to find multiple ways to consume the same thing. You know, eating my Christmas cakes and having them, too.

Of course, the upshot of that is now, a year later, I have evidence of my gluttony besides the disgusting moon bounce that my gut has since become (Santa Claus is a horrible role model). Here are pictures of the former. I will spare you ones of the latter.